If someone has told you that you need a MIAM, or you have seen it mentioned on a court form, you are probably wondering whether it really applies to you. In most cases involving children or finances after separation, the answer is yes — but there are exceptions.

The short answer

In England and Wales, most people are expected to attend a MIAM before applying to court for child arrangements (such as where children live and how they spend time with each parent) or for financial orders following separation or divorce. The purpose is to show the court that you have considered mediation as an alternative before asking a judge to decide.

Attending a MIAM does not commit you to mediation. It is simply the point at which you learn about your options and a mediator assesses whether mediation could work for you.

When a MIAM may not be required

There are situations where a MIAM may not be appropriate or required. These are known as MIAM exemptions and include concerns about domestic abuse, genuinely urgent applications, certain existing court proceedings, and cases where mediation is clearly unsuitable. Whether an exemption applies is ultimately a matter for the court, though a mediator can help you understand whether your circumstances might qualify.

Do both people need to attend?

Each person attends their own MIAM separately — you do not attend together. One person booking a MIAM does not force the other into mediation. After your MIAM, if you wish to explore mediation, the mediator contacts the other person to invite them to their own appointment.

What if you apply without one?

If a MIAM is required and you apply to court without attending, the court may ask for an explanation, delay your proceedings, or direct you to attend a MIAM before going further. Sorting it out early usually avoids delay.

Still not sure?

Being unsure is very common. If you are considering applying to court about children or finances and no exemption obviously applies, booking a MIAM is almost always the sensible next step — and it keeps your options open. At Digital MIAM, appointments are online, start at £95, and a Fast Track option is available typically the same day. If you would like to read more first, our free sister resource, The Family Mediation Project, explains every stage in plain English.