A MIAM is a short, private meeting with an accredited family mediator. You attend on your own — the other person is not there. This guide explains what actually happens, the questions you can expect, how long it takes, and how the meeting ends, so you can attend with confidence.

Before the appointment

You attend the MIAM alone; each person has their own separate meeting with the mediator. You do not need to bring documents, evidence, or legal paperwork — it is a conversation, not a formal hearing. With Digital MIAM, you complete a short guided form in advance, then join by video call from a quiet, private space where you feel comfortable speaking openly.

How long a MIAM takes

Most MIAMs last between 45 minutes and one hour. Straightforward cases can take around 30 minutes; more complex situations, particularly where safety concerns need to be explored, may run up to 90 minutes. There is no fixed minimum or maximum set by law, but the mediator must cover certain areas — explaining mediation, assessing suitability, and completing safety screening — so a proper MIAM is rarely very short. An online MIAM covers exactly the same ground as an in-person one and takes about the same time.

The questions you'll be asked

The mediator guides the conversation. There are no trick questions and nothing to revise for. You can expect to be asked about:

• Background and context — how long you have been separated, whether you have children and their ages, the current living arrangements, and whether you have tried to resolve things already.

• The issues you need to resolve — whether it is children, finances, property, or a combination, what the main disagreements are, and what outcome you are hoping for. You do not need to have prepared formal positions; the mediator is gathering information, not negotiating with you.

• Safety screening — every MIAM includes sensitive, confidential questions about domestic abuse, coercive control, and any concerns about children's welfare. Your answers are not shared with the other person or the court. Raising a concern does not disqualify you from getting your certificate.

• Mediation itself — what you understand about the process and whether you feel it could work for you. Saying you are unsure or sceptical is completely fine.
  

How the MIAM ends

At the end, the mediator tells you what they have assessed. There are three possible outcomes: mediation is suitable and the other person will be invited to their own MIAM; mediation is not suitable, for example because of safety concerns or the other person's refusal; or you decide you do not wish to proceed. In every case, the mediator issues your MIAM certificate (the FM1 form) — the document the court requires.

Book with confidence

Most people find a MIAM far less daunting than they expected once they know it is a private, supportive conversation. Our online MIAMs are held by FMC-registered mediators and start at £95, with a Fast Track option typically available the same day. When you are ready, you can book in minutes.